How is it different from “just “ thinking?

What makes being in a Thinking Session different?

Have you ever wanted to change something but you couldn’t see how to make it happen? You seemed to be going around in circles as you tried to figure out what to do? Or maybe you know what you want to happen but you can’t seem to make a start. Something is stopping you from taking the first step, from making the first move. 

I’d like to share with you what can make a difference, and free you up to make the change, to take the first step. I’ve discovered the magic that can happen in a Thinking Session, when you figure out what to do and feel energised and confident about doing it.    

Why does being in a Thinking Session make a difference?

When people ask me about how a Thinking Session “works”, they are sometimes concerned that they’ll be “over-thinking”. They may have found themselves thinking a lot about a problem or a situation and yet they can’t seem to get anywhere. Have you found yourself thinking about something over and over, frustrated because you can’t move forward? I understand that. I’ve been there. When I learned how different it is to think things through in the presence of a Thinking Partner, I was amazed at how it unlocked fresh thinking, how it gave me the clarity and the confidence to proceed. 

Having experienced the magic of what can happen in a Thinking Environment, I decided to train as a Time to Think Coach,  so that I could give others the opportunity to discover their own truth. 

Would you like to  think more clearly about something, and find the courage to follow your own path?

How does it work?

In a Thinking Session, you can think about whatever you want to focus on.  As your thinking partner, my generative attention and the questions I can offer will help you pinpoint what you want to address, will help you explore your options, and will enable you to map out what you want to happen next.  

How is thinking in this way different from “just” thinking ?

Have you noticed what happens if you’re interrupted while you’re thinking something through? You lose your train of thought. Even if you can resume after the interruption, the quality of your thinking will have been impaired by the disruption.

Often, we’re distracted by things happening externally, beyond our control. There are also times when we distract ourselves. This might be to avoid thinking about something, if it’s difficult to tackle. Do you ever avoid an issue that is daunting? The problem is that avoiding the issue or problem can increase the feeling that you’re stuck, it can make you feel more powerless.

Setting aside dedicated time for a Thinking Session, is a way to give yourself time and space to think, free from interruption or distraction. Time where you can think in a safe, encouraging and non-judgmental space. Knowing that you won’t be interrupted during the session creates a sense of ease and calm that will enable you go further in your thinking, not limiting yourself.  

What happens in your brain in this psychologically safe environment is borne out by neuroscience. In “The Promise that Changes Everything: I Won’t Interrupt You” (2021 p.33 ), Nancy Kline explains how being in  the presence of a thinking partner’s unwavering appreciative attention helps to calm the brain’s amygdala, so that stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol are kept at bay, which enables clearer thinking and  better decision-making.

What do you get when you think well  for yourself, in a Thinking Session?

Clarity: 

When you’re faced with a problem or want something to change, it’s important to think what outcome you hope for, and to consider what question you’re hoping to answer for yourself, that can lead to that outcome. As you explore this, you may find there is something hidden beneath what was initially appearing as a the problem. You may discover there is something else concerning you, that the issue is linked to something else that needs your attention.   

Discover your own answers: 

We’ve all been in situations where others offer us advice, as we try to deal with a problem or a challenge. It can be tempting to listen to them, especially when you’re struggling to see a way forward and someone else appears to have all the answers. It’s important through, even if others have useful information to offer, not to be influenced by their opinions, by their perceptions. Give yourself the time to examine your own thinking, to develop your own view, as opposed to taking on what someone else thinks. In order to find your own answer or solution, consider what you already know and see if there is other information you need that could help you.

If others around you are telling you what to do, it is important to take time to think for yourself, to generate your own insights and answers.

Own your thinking, Own your destiny:  

Sometimes we say the things we need to hear. When you express yourself in a Thinking Session, you may hear yourself say things you didn’t realise you were thinking or feeling.  You may have insights. You may discover possibilities. In the calm spaciousness of a Thinking Session, you can build your confidence about what needs to be done, and what you can do. Knowing your own mind will not only lead to better decision-making, it will also increase the likelihood that you’ll  follow through on it and make it real.

When you own the thinking, it can empower you to own what comes next.

Questioning assumptions:

Assumptions are all around us. When they’re true, they can serve us well.  The problem that can arise is if we base a decision on an untrue assumption. It can hold us back. In a Thinking Session, you can explore what might be untrue and limiting you. My incisive questioning will help you uncover untrue assumptions,  and unlock fresher thinking to liberate you from them.

Information: 

Have you ever made a decision and then discovered afterwards that you were missing information that would have led to a different outcome? Or that your decision was based on information that was flawed or inaccurate.  Thinking well will help you identify what information you already have, and what information you need, and help you see what’s true and accurate.  

What is the magic of what can happen in a Thinking Session?

For me, the feeling of “magic” occurs as a thinker discovers their own answers, as they see opportunities, as the impossible suddenly appears possible. I’ve seen someone’s eyes light up  when they realise they know what needs to be done,  when they understand what they’ve been feeling and what they want to do about it. 

I’ve seen a thinker becoming energised as they look forward to taking the next step.

This magic happens when you can think in the presence of attention that is exquisitely generative. While it feels magical, there is real science behind it. The science of what happens when we’re in a safe space, when we‘re truly encouraged, when we’re listened to with interest and appreciation. 

I think of it as magical.  It’s also very real.

Talk to me if you’re interested in discovering how this can happen for you in a Coaching Session, or if you’d like to learn how to listen in this way and create a Thinking Environment for others